Category: Waste

New year, who dis?

Dammit. January is over, and I never nailed down my resolutions.

I know the trend now is not making New Year’s resolutions. But I’ve been resolving to not make resolutions for years. So as an early adopter, I’d decided to make a few this year. Here’s how that went . . .

January 1

I can’t think of any resolutions yet. Unfort, the obvious ones aren’t available. I’ve already lost the pandemic pounds, and I’ve been doing yoga 3–5 mornings a week—gasp!—since everything went online (one good side of the lockdowns), so neither of those goals are available. I’m pretty sure I earned more money this past year than I have before. I’ve even . . . dare I say . . . gotten way past the fifth date with somebody without busting out the ol’ “It’s not a match” line. In fact, to the contrary.

I think I’m too happy for my own good.

As the classic Elvis Costello song goes, “I’m not angry anymore.” I might posit that it’s all the good kind of chemicals being released in my body from . . . well, my mom might be reading this, so never mind. But it actually started earlier than that. Specifically January 20, 2021, when the Ur–Florida Man had to vacate the White House, and lib-tards like me collectively breathed a big sigh of relief. Or was I the only naive one? Was I crazy to think that everything would start being okay, that looneytunes wouldn’t be running Senate hearings, and rich white Supreme Court justices who can afford to have kids (or good birth control) wouldn’t be making decisions for all womankind and okay maybe I’m a little angry!!

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An Environerd’s Xmas Wish List

My mom keeps asking me what I want for Christmas this year. As she does.

Aren’t they pretty??
Pre-owned, no less!

So I told her I’d love some cross-country skis. Not that she would know what to buy—or that I would know how to use them. Or that we’ll ever have enough snow here to actually ski on again, given the changing climate. But I live in the country now, and desire to be more sporty.

I then did a LOT of searching on Facebook Marketplace, and found a gorgeous, barely (if at all) used pair of cross-country skis — and boots — which I bought myself for a song.

Then I thought maybe I could ask my mom for snow shoes, which, just like cross-country skiing, I have experienced all of twice, ending up either covered in snow, or drenched in sweat, or both. But I then found snow shoes on FBM as well — and bought them. Fancy ones, metallic red, with a little bar you can flip up under the heel when you’re shoeing up a steep hill. ‘Cause there’s nothing asthmatics do with more finesse than trudge up snowy inclines in dry, sub-freezing air.

Also pre-owned . . . and candy-cane colored!

So now what do I tell my mom I want?

Wireless earbuds sound nice, although they feel kind of . . . extra. I mean, at least the sporting goods were purchased second-hand. I do like supporting a circular economy . . .

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Waste Management: The Show!

This week I did my first LIVE ONLINE performance. It was a blast!!

San Francisco theater company The Marsh asked if I’d do some excerpts from “Waste Management: The Show” on Zoom and YouTube Live on Wednesday night. And a little enviro-chat with the host and the Zoom audience. So of course I said, “Okay.” And then, “What did I just get myself into??”

But I transformed a corner of my dining room into a little TV studio, and voilà. You’ll get a sneak peek from my upcoming book as well, so grab a beverage, and settle in.

A woman with waaay too much on her plate gives herself 49 days to save the planet. (Or at least get people to use less plastic.)

Feel free to leave comments, thoughts, rotten tomatoes…

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