Category: Bad Guys

Earth Day 5.0, Pandemic-style

EarthMask

Doodle by Karina Fassett, IG @shewouldnotdraw

Okay, so now we’re in the middle of a pandemic.

But not to worry, your friendly little enviro-nerd is here to keep her eye on things for you while you obsessively watch Cuomo’s briefings, try to get your mom to figure out the HouseParty app, or just stress-eat yourself into oblivion. Or, goddess forbid, deal with the coronavirus itself.

In fact, Cuomo just started today’s presser; I’ll be back in a bit.

So. It’s the 50th anniversary of EARTH DAY. Where is everybody? I’m quarantino’ed in my new little town upstate (see previous post for deets on that), after I hightailed it out of NYC  — unfortunately leaving many of my belongings behind, including most of my clothes and a partial box of protective masks that could be ten years old, but I’d take ’em right about now.

Leather mask

Protective in all the wrong ways.

Btw, I just Googled “protective masks” + “shopping” to show you the type of masks they were, and this pleather BDSM number came up. I mean, it’s cute, but it’s the exact opposite of what I need right now. 

Anyways, should environmentalists say “We told you so,” or should we just head straight to the market for wine? I mean groceries.

Polar bears be like, “How do you like it?”

Last month, before shit got real, we were joking that it was the Zombie Apocalypse out there. (Find my NYC cab driver’s definition of the apocalypse here.) Before the ad agency where I freelance went remote, this is how the company cafeteria responded to the budding pandemic: Read More…

Advertising Is Garbage

ED garbage duratrans

Part of the Earth Day campaign. (Before I proofread it, obvs.) More below.

So a lot has happened since I was here last. Michael Cohen. Rudy Giuliani. Scott Pruitt’s hearing. Eric Schneiderman’s bitch-slapping. And a porn star’s lawyer who makes more sense than any of ’em.

In better news, California (where I am currently, hanging out with my parents) will now require all new homes to have solar power. I just did a quick search for other good news, but it’s mostly boring stuff. Donald Glover’s (aka Childish Gambino) This Is America video is pretty cool.

Oh, I also did a couple of fun performances. (Here’s one of them.)

And Earth Day happened. Dunno who besides me really cares about that, but I had to get away from my computer, and into the woods . . .

ForestPark

Plant-based hike.

So I went to Queens. Where I “hiked” with two Columbia friends through Forest Park, to the soothing sounds of the Jackie Robinson Parkway, after we’d eaten the vegan quiche I’d made, and pounded a few Bloody Marys around my friend’s kitchen table.

Because it had been a crazy coupl’a weeks.

Remember the Earth Day pitch I made to the CEO? (Refresh your memory HERE.)

quiche

Plant-based brunch.

Did I mention it was for one of the top ad agencies in the world? Pretty sure I didn’t. When I last wrote about it, the CEO of said ad agency had just referred me to the CFO and the building architecture person (the latter is the one who oversaw getting the place LEED-certified when the agency moved into it; dunno who besides me [and her] cares about that). Public Relations was at the meeting, too. They all loved it.

Then things got a little . . . weird. Read More…

SAY something, already.

Utopia

(Not Justin Timberlake.)

I’m obsessed with the new Justin Timberlake single, “Say Something” — an acoustic, harmonic build of a song that inspires the heck out of me. I’m even trying to learn that rhythm on my uke, but I’m kind of a spaz. I’ll post a video below, but meantime here are some of the lyrics . . .

Everyone knows all about my direction.
And in my heart somewhere,
I want to go there. Still I don’t go there.
And everybody says, “Say something, then, say something. Say something, then, say something . . . ”

Trouble is, I deal with depression. Like, the icky, real kind of depression.

Jeez, I really didn’t want to admit that here. Pay no attention to the frightened girl behind the curtain! But some of my favorite people also deal with it, including my hero Rachel Maddow. Plus a lot of other cool peeps like Lady Gaga, Carrie Fisher (RIP), Kendrick Lamar, and pretty much any famous writer you’ve ever heard of, from Sylvia Plath to J.K. Rowling. Mine started in my 20s. Well, when I was a kid, it manifested as shyness — obviously I’ve cured myself of that! Now it’s an intermittent existential crisis that hits me in sloppy, irregular waves. Last week I felt like there wasn’t much of a point to anything; right now — after a weekend that included exercise, writing and fun social plans — I feel quite normal and happy.

PLUS: Tada!! I have a meeting today with the CEO of a place where I freelance, to pitch my creating and leading an Earth Day extravaganza for the company. Read More…